Don't believe the invite I sent for Bad Movie Night. I tried to connect "Baby New Year" with another killer baby night since so many people are assembling babies currently. But really we've moved on from killer babies onto killer toddlers.
In It's Alive III: Island of the Alive the killer babies are put on an island to lessen their opportunities for killing. It worked in Lord of the Flies, right? Four years later people come to check on how they've not been killing. They indeed have become reformed and return to their homes to become productive members of society. Oops! I went over the whole plot.
In Shogun Assassin the actor playing the baby is four years old but he's in a baby carriage the whole movie (witness the alternative title Lone Wolf and Cub: Baby Cart in Peril). See the continuity? Sandra Bernhard does a voice for the Engish dub. That's weird.
We're going to watch the best horror movies from 2009 suited to Bad Movie Night. That precludes Let The Right One In which is too slow and isn't goofy/gory enough. Same with Big Man Japan:
Okay, that one might be goofy enough. The My Bloody Valentine remake was good but the DVD doesn't come with enough 3-D glasses for everyone. Martyrs is too horrifying and would bring everyone down. Alien Trespass was a movie trying to be a bad movie, which never works. I haven't seen Zombieland, Paranormal Activity or The House of the Devil yet, which all look promising.
So that leaves these two. Trick 'r Treat is an anthology movie starring Anna Paquin and Dylan Baker. Yeah, you know him. He's this guy:
How many of you are thinking child molester right now?
Movies Wow, it's the middle of the month and I haven't done this yet. A couple of weeks ago, this is what caught my eye and some I put on hold.
Stepfather II: Make Room For Daddy - I hear the sequel isn't half bad and Terry O'Quinn returns.
Jennifer's Body - This actually appeared on the AV Club's worst movies of the year list today but I named it the 7th best movie of the year back in Decemberbefore ever seeing it. We'll see who's right.
Wolfen - The werewolf movie from 1981 that's not American Werewolf in London or The Howling. But do those movies have Edward James Olmos?
Paranormal Activity - Good lord, this is still out in theaters. I'm putting Avatar on hold right now!
Buck Rogers in the 25th century, the complete epic series - I think I only got the first disc, just to remember what it was like. Also, Twiki:
Essential Dinosaur Pack - I probably had something funny to say about this, I don't remember. Maybe something like, there better a Eustreptospondylus in that pack! No, that's not it.
Breastfeeding and Returning to Work - This one too. Hell, write your own joke in the comments.
Music The essential video collection by Joel, Billy or Captain & Tennille, the ultimate collection - Something along the lines of "these are lame!"
Vapours by Islands - Did I mention that I missed my 10 year high school reunion to see the Unicorns and it was the second best concert I ever saw?
Ultraviolet by Kid Sister - I didn't know that was out. Hey guy, this is out.
Rose city by Viva Voce - Marissa and I went to see this band at Cafe Montmarte but they seemingly cancelled them for a wedding reception. Now the bar is gone. I win Cafe Momo. Muhahahahahahaha. Ha.
Pirate radio motion picture soundtrack - I heard the movie was bad but the music was good. Now I can hear all the music but look at something else!
Don't Open Till Christmas mercifully isn't about some Santa Claus that goes around killing people. It's about someone going around killing Santa Claus'. Switcheroo! BleedingSkull.com says:
"Witness dubbed lines that appear without mouth movement. Cringe at the cheese-spook score, popping up every five seconds, regardless of what’s transpiring onscreen. Scratch your head at the bicycle riding Santa, fumbling around some kind of wax museum in a drunken stupor for nearly ten minutes"
Here's director of Shaun of the Dead Edgar Wright's comment on Don't movies:
We already watched Don't Go Into The Woods... Alone! which I DON'T remember too well but it's by the guy who did past BMN movie The Executioner, Part II , which I loved, and future BMN movie Lady Street Fighter, which I also love! We will soon watch Don't Panic a movie out of Mexico City.
I'm glad I brought up Mexico City. Santa Claus comes from that same city and as you might expect from all the UFO visitations and drug kidnappings the inhabitants of that city have become a little nutty. Bleeding Skull again:
"I hereby proclaim this seasonal nightmare required feel-good viewing once a year, every year. Just don’t show it to any little kids."
Note that we're not really watching the movie but the Mystery Science Theater 3000 episode with this movie that just came out a couple of weeks ago. With limited time only Tom Servo figure! No, I haven't played with it. Much.
If you don't live in Wisconsin, you might not know that we had a pretty big snow storm last night. Well, it turns out that my 8 month old puppy LOVES the snow! Tonight, Michel and I took him out to play in the snow (which is deeper than he is tall), and i took a video and some pictures:
Christmas horror is my favorite genre of horror after zombies. Oh Santa Zombie: Slip a Sable Under The Tree... Alone!, why don't you exist? Feeders 2 is SOV and from my personal POV those are the kind of movies I LOV. Yeah, that's all I got for this one.
Silent Night, Deadly Night 2 is only the second time we're going to watch the sequel to a movie we saw previously. The last time was for our third movie ever, Sleepaway Camp 2. But that was right after watching Sleepaway Camp. SN, DN 2 is out of print and demanding 30 dollars for the DVD! So I bought a VHS for 6 bucks. If Linnea Quigley appears in this only in flashback to the first movie and we already counted that one does it still count in the LQ, which would now be at 7? That's almost 5% of all the movies!
Apparently all you need to be a Phantom of the [Blank] movie is a guy who had a disabling accident who's not seen much after that. Like Gary Busey!
To complete the mall theme, since we already saw Chopping Mall, I haven't seen The Initiation with Daphne Zuniga yet and Hide and Go Shriek is out of print, there's Dawn of the Dead. DotD will be our 150th movie, our sesquicentennial. If I'd thought ahead it would have been fun to note our 150th movie with a sasquacentennial celebration of bigfoot movies. Is that a stretch?
Both these movies have Ken Foree in them. He was Buford 'Bubba' Brownlee in From Beyond and looks like this. Remember?:
Hey!, the AV Club just posted the Best Bad Movies of the decade. Guess which one was number one. And don't worry, we'll get to Dragon Wars and Glitter soon. Also, I think this means I have to watch The Happening after swearing off M. Night Shama etc. Crap.
P.S. I found out if you play the two lambada movie trailers from the last post simultaneously you get a Wizard of Oz/Pink Floyd thing happening.
