Saturday, December 31, 2022

Best Movies of 2022

1. Catherine Called Birdy


Yep, a movie based on a YA novel set in medieval times is the best movie of the year. Why didn't The Hunger Games have hot monks? 

2. Glass Onion

When Rian Johnson makes a movie it's always appeared in my top three. 

3. Weird: The Al Yankovic Story

The pool scene is insane with cameos. Andy Warhol, Salvador Dali, Gallagher. All sadly dead now. 

Actually, I've seen Angela Lansbury, Stephen Sondheim, Leslie Jordon and Taylor Hawkins in things from this year, all in the last two weeks. I better avoid Babylon, everyone in Hollywood is in that movie. Just kidding, I had no intention to watch Babylon.

4. Nope

Yep

5. Apollo 10 1/2: A Space Age Childhood

Half this movie is just the narrator telling you what Houston was like in the late Sixties. Do that for mid-Eighties Milwaukee please. There's no significant thing like the moon landing to set it around, it would have to be about that time Badfinger was on Shock Theater.


6. X

7. Crimes of the Future

8. The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent

9. Prey

10. Deep Water

If only for Tracy Letts' death:


Best Television of 2022

 1. Reservation Dogs


2. Yellowjackets


3. Atlanta


4. Better Things

5. Hacks

6. Murderville


7. The Kids in the Hall


I was worried this would be sad because everybody is old now. Then I realized they often played old people. They just need less make-up now. Plus, brief update on the opening credits pregnant in a bikini dancing on a rooftop woman.


8. The Boys

Just imagine a clip of something horribly gory.

9. The Afterparty

10. Light and Magic

Best Music of 2022

 I only bought one album in 2022, Wet Leg. The best album of the year is Wet Leg!



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Best Movies of 2021

The top five movies of 2021:

1. Nobody


Which had the best bus fight of last year since the one in Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings was somewhat worse.


Still good though.

2. The Green Knight

[Did not feature a bus fight]

3. New York Ninja

This is a movie where the footage, from 1984, was discovered without any audio or script. They put it together anyway, guessing at plot and dialogue. Here's a fight that takes place next to hover-buses:


4. The Suicide Squad

Here's a scene of a shark on a bus. Nobody fights so that's why this movie is at number four.


5. Malignant 

Here's a scene from Basket Case 3 instead. They're pretty much the same movie.


Honorable mention: Mass Transportation 2: Oops All Bus Fights.